Posts Tagged ‘God’s plan’

Can you hear me now?

My husband has said to me on multiple occasions, “For someone who doesn’t like change, you sure do change things a lot.” He’s right, I don’t like change. What I don’t like is huge, monumental changes like moving, changing jobs, death, illness, that kind of thing. I’m all about changing out my wardrobe. Like yeah, what woman doesn’t? I also like to paint, redecorate and move things around my house. Those are easy and refreshing changes that easily lift my spirits.

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Spelt…For-GIVE-ness

“But she wished she had had the guts to go up to him and say hello.
Or possibly break his legs, she wasn’t sure which.”
― Stieg Larsson, The Girl Who Played with Fire

Meme & Jeff at fair

So cute with his pretty blonde hair and blue eyes and me with the mom jeans.

When I was a single mom, I had a lot of pent-up anger. One, I had a lot of previous life choices and disappointing situations that left me questioning my purpose in this world. Two, I was frustrated with myself for getting pregnant, but now looking back realize it was a blessing. Three, I was mad at my son’s father for lying to me about not being married when in fact he was. Also, when the little guy was 18 months old, his father sued me for paternity and custody. He had decided he wanted to be a dad after all; however, didn’t have his wife’s buy-in. It was a long, drawn out, ugly mess. There were many days I struggled with the assault on my motherhood and personal choices. Thankfully, I had a friend who talked me out of my desire to do sinister things to him like running him over with my car. The anger turned into depression and it stuck to me like chewing gum on the bottom of my shoe for the next seventeen years. Even though I had accepted a life with Christ, gotten married and went onto have another child, the anger was always percolating inside, and particularly when I had to see him every other weekend and hear his verbal insults come out through the mouth of my child.

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Are you all in?

Have you ever been trapped in water or had a near drowning experience? I know full well what it’s like and the need to be brought safely out. You’d think growing up in Florida, I’d have a better feet in water 2command of swimming, but not so much. My younger brother and I were forever getting into either pool water or the ocean surf over our heads. My oldest sister was always in charge of pulling us out, Read the rest of this entry »